Not everyone forgets me

Checked my emails and saw this forwarded to me:

“Had a great experience with Angela of the Membership Office just now. She was so pleasant and personable and gave me great advice regarding the new membership scheme. It was great to speak to someone so nice and efficient.”

I remember this person well and I didn’t think much of the conversation at the time, believing that it would be just another member who forgot about me after hanging up. I’m glad they didn’t because they just made my day just a little bit brighter! (:

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Days 5 and 6

Day 5 – a time when you thought about ending your own life

I’m going to be honest here. I’ve thought about it. And even attempted to at least once. All I’m going to say is that it was a very difficult time for me and that I learned to not take life for granted. I’m not going to say that I had it rough, because there’s always someone out there whose life is more difficult and I have no right to compare. Even though it gets hard to be happy all the time. I try my best to look at the brighter side of things. It makes life more fun!

Day 6 – write 30 interesting facts about yourself

I’ll try to do this, but I don’t think I know that many interesting things about me. Let’s see how it goes!

30. I’m actually only 18. Even though people think I’m older.
29. I was born premature. 2 months and 13 days premature to be exact . I was supposed to be born on Valentine’s Day but my heart stopped so I was born on December 1st, 1994. 
28. I spent an entire month in an incubator.
27. I was born in the Philippines and moved to Canada when I was about 2.
26. I am the eldest of 4 children.
25. I have about 13 cousins and counting just on my dad’s side of the family.
24. I’m forgetful…  So I apologize in advance!
23. I understand tagalog, ilocano and a bit of my dad’s dialect but I don’t know how to speak it.
22. I’m a shy person, but apparently it doesn’t show.
21. I’m afraid of pretty much everything.
20. I didn’t graduate high school at the school I went to for four years. I actually graduated at an alternative learning school (also called an adult school)
19. I actually didn’t even go to my graduation
18. I love baking. In fact, I intend to turn it into a business when I graduate in four years.
17. I am a young entrepreneur and I love what I do.
16. Sometimes, I just love laying in bed and sleeping in or reading.
15. I love reading.
14. I know how to golf. My dad actually made my siblings and I take lessons when I was younger.
13. I love shopping and it makes me so happy that I started my business because I actually get paid to ship online!
12. I tend to push people away even though I don’t want to.
11. I get distracted easily. But at the same time if I drift of info my thoughts or whatever distracted me, it takes a bit of effort to get my attention again.
10. I do so much thinking that sometimes I feel like I’m on the outside looking in.
9. Even though I love going out, most of the time, part of me is separate and is always just in its own world thinking about things.
8. I have a low self-esteem and I feel really bad about myself a lot. So that’s why I don’t take compliments well. And it also means I’m negative when it comes to personal things.
7. I’m scared to go back to school in September because I don’t know if I know anyone there in my year.
6. I hate being out of my comfort zone. Which is one reason why I’m scared to go back to school.
5. I put up a façade when I get uncomfortable. It actually just consists of me pretending to be outgoing and comfortable when really, I’m scared to death of my surroundings.
4. I tend to either be in the extremes. Either I’m too nice, or I come off as really rude. But I hate being mean/rude so I’m usually always really nice even when I shouldn’t be.
3. Even though I fight with my siblings, I love those kids a lot and I’m not sure what I’d be like if they weren’t around.
2. I only like cleaning when someone doesn’t make me do it.
1. I am a very indecisive person. But I’m working on that.

Oh wow, I actually did it! I’m so surprised that I did. I’m sure there’s more, but you have to read on and get to know me better!
How you enjoyed! See you all soon!

An Open Letter to my Future Partner

Dear You,

I don’t know if we’re married or not so that’s why I kept it very general. I hope you know that at this moment I love kids, puppies, romantic gestures, and all that sappy stuff. I just hope you won’t give up on me when I get stubborn, anxious, over-the-top, and sometimes even a bit crazy. I think I might have an anxiety problem. Remind me to get that checked out please?

I’m grateful you’ve stuck around as long as you have and I already know that I love you. I hope you don’t mind when I get the way I am sometimes. Especially since I know I can be a lot to handle, but I promise to try my hardest not to. I get emotional really easily and I suck at organizing my thoughts (well at this moment in time at least) so please don’t hate me for that. I don’t like having issues unsolved and I prefer when things are wrapped up neatly in a little bow if they can be. I’m quite messy right now and I’m not too sure if it continues until I get older but again, I apologize.

I hope you realize by now that when I decide on something I won’t stop until I get it/get it done. I also am so hard-headed sometimes that I will continue to argue with you just to keep from admitting that I’m wrong. I won’t be surprised if I’m still like that when you read this. Sorry. Also, I say sorry a lot. I don’t really understand why and I hope I’m able to tell you in the future because I have a much better understanding of myself but I’m not really sure if that’ll happen.

Please don’t let me push you away. I don’t intend to but I know I do it. I just hope I stopped that habit sometime in between now and then. I’m going to do the best that I can but I know I’ll make mistakes and I’m going to be hard-headed but don’t let that stop you. Because if you promise to still love me and stick with me, then I know I’ll love you to the best of my ability and I will be the best person I can be for you and our future family.

Sincerely,
Me